perfectmatch | week four

[If nothing else, this is quite fortuitous. Luka's answer is succinct, yet an entire world and life lie beyond it. It's as a window through which he might be able to peer into what was previously the unknown, if only because he'd been too apathetic to look more carefully.

Now the question is, where does he begin?]

Luka . . . Could it be that this seemingly endless maze, with its countless mirrors and reflections, is no different from any other room for you?

I'm always on some time of surveillance, for entertainment or otherwise.

[ or he was until very recently.

luka starts into the maze, not looking to see if the other man will follow. ]

Are you going to use this time to get to know me more, now? What's the point? It's my pick this weekend and not yours—you made your choice.

[There is a feeling that the surveillance serves multiple purposes, none of which is truly for Luka's sake.]

Indeed, my mind was made.

[He won't deny it as he follows.]

That does not mean this exchange between us is fruitless. Though I regret that it has taken this long, I would like to see more of you in the time allotted to us. That, too, is my choice.

Cute. And what about my choice? What if I just refuse you? Are you going to just keep shuffling along?

[ he does keep walking, not with a strategy but for the sake of moving. ]

Nay, I shall walk.

[He has shuffled enough. Now that his feet have rested, he must go forward, consequences all.]

Your choice is your own. For ones such as you and I, that bears boundless significance, does it not?

[ luka wants to do so many things right now. but instead of acting on them, he just speaks. ]

I'm not interested in hashing out what we have in common anymore. [ he said his piece and that was the end of that. ]

If you have anything left to say to me, say it.

. . . Then I will share my reasons for the choice made that night.

I did not disbelieve you when you raised the common thread between us. [And he'll leave it at that if Luka will hear no more.] Yet, in our time here, I have come to see that there are numerous threads where I previously did not notice them, each with a color of its own. The hope I could not grasp ere coming here . . . So as not to be half-hearted, as well as to better understand my place within the game, I pursued one such thread where I felt a vibration from the other side.

[ luka feels much the same way he did when they first met. they're so similar up to a point, that talking with yi sang is like looking at a mirror that's just slightly askew, a reflection that is just a little wrong that makes luka want to crush it.

he is who he is because he could not afford to be anything else. not in the past and not here, despite what everyone has told him. he's isolated and will likely continue to be isolated in the future with the exception of one. it's that new and novel sprout that makes this so grating. ]

The matches aren't about "vibrations" and "hope". [ "don't you see that? I know you do, because I see it." ]

With the exception of Furina and Ringo, and possibly one more pair, they're all basic logic inferences on paper.

[ yes, luka had done the very same thing when he picked maya week two, but this isn't about him. ]

Your heart obviously lies somewhere else regardless, something you're finally no longer blind to. But you had your choice as you said, unlike how I'll be restricted in mine.

[Exceptions are the bane of researchers, and even now they're a bump on the road, but Yi Sang finds that he doesn't mind these in particular. Just as he saw similarities between himself and Luka, he saw them in Odile. Choosing one, loath as he was to do it, still paved the way forward. It's not for anyone to decide on his behalf how right or wrong he was for that.]

You refer to Miss Yingying. As you had advised, I extended her an apology, and now must thank you for bringing the matter to my attention.

[It's a disruption to the topic, but he feels it necessary to put out here, because he's grateful. Luka's words still left an impact and made a difference, and not just for Yi Sang.]

But that is not true, Luka. You made your choice with Miss Maya and she, with you. Regardless of what comes next, that will not change.

Regardless? I know what's coming next.

[ the last thing he needs is reassurance there. ]

I'm talking about the game. [ the fact that it is looking reasonably likely that he'll have to go up there and pick someone who wouldn't pick him is perhaps understandably, a sore spot even for someone like him. ]

[Ah, there it is. He stops to study Luka's back. The sound of a crack.

If only they had had time. But the past can't be undone, and many bared themselves that night. He can only confront what's now in front of him.]

You were as much of a choice then, and still are now, else I would not be here. I apologize if I have led you to believe otherwise and hurt you in doing so.

[ an apology is what he wants, but not one like that. luka pauses, turning first to look at his reflection in the mirror. (i forgot a fit for this thread but please know his entire back is out because it's luka, so enjoy that yi sang). the reflection he sees is the same as always, at least on the surface.

he turns after a moment to regard his apparent partner, proper. ]

Tell me—why should I pick you? Without mentioning the others, the wish, or this game.

[ a selfish ask, but this is who he is. ]

[(Oh, my.)

There are too many constraints within the game when he dislikes the idea of choosing between fellows. He was never here for the wish, and the others aren't relevant to the subject at hand. Thus, the freedom Luka grants him is, regardless of the outcome, a boon.]

. . . The night you bared yourself to me, I glimpsed something familiar yet different.

[For Luka is his own, as are his pain and his isolation. Yi Sang can recognize the void, but that experience is uniquely the former's.]

You were cultivated in a garden, grown under an artificial light that determined your reflection. But that is not the you whom you match in the mirror. This time . . . I want to see you again, on your terms, without averting my gaze.

And how will you see me? You said on my terms, but I don't have the want to perform for you. And I've said what I wanted to say—I know what I am and I know what I'm capable of. I won't plead for your understanding or anything else.

[ that much is more a function of who he is, one of the reasons why he declined to follow and conference with odile. it's beneath him.

luka is a lonely, isolated soul, but he is prideful. he's never doubted himself in his entire life and he might not even be capable of it. he'll persist regardless, in spite of himself and in spite of his feelings which he's grown more familiar with in his weeks here. ]

You do not have to perform, nor to plead.

[For a performer, to perform is to express oneself at the height of something. Be it the whims of others or his own heart, it's an expression of passion. Yi Sang doesn't need that or believe himself entitled to one. Throwing him against a tree wasn't a performance; it was the raw, naked truth.]

Simply . . . I would like to see who you are, no matter the angle that is shown.

[Luka doesn't even have to look at him. Like a skewed reflection, he'll watch.]

[ ....... ]

Is that how you want me to call upon you this weekend?

week four | dates

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