[affixes Rom with another Look (TM) at that, but he lets the joke die there. mostly because he has to take a moment and recollect each secret that isn't his own. most of them have leaked out of his brain already, but. . .]

[. . .]

. . . if it's the one about your parents abandoning you as a kid, then I'm going to feel a little crappy for complaining about my dad.